Effective communication skills and effective leadership skills do not always come naturally, and both were sorely lacking during the last monthly session of Warren County government on Monday.

The lowest point of the evening came when Commissioner Deborah Evans brought Commissioner Steven Helton’s family into the discussion. Specifically, she made statements in reference to his mother and one of her not raising him right. When is that ever OK? I say never. The comments definitely spiraled down into something that shouldn’t be tolerated. This was a government meeting and not a Facebook page. 

Use of “you” directives and getting personal are two signs that someone has poor communication skills. Common barriers to effective communication include stress, out-of-control emotion and lack of focus. I think all those were present at one time or another during her statements. To offer up a few: 

“You act like a bunch of children.”

“You don’t ever listen when Executive Haley answers you. You never do.”

“If you were my son, I would have been so ashamed of the way you talked to our sheriff.”

“You want to be the bully. You want to be the showoff and it makes me sick. Were you not taught any manners by your mother?”

I feel Mrs. Evans owes Commissioner Helton and his mother an apology. That remorse should be offered in a public setting. A private apology isn’t sufficient for such a public verbal attack on someone’s character and against their mother. 

Evans wasn’t the only commissioner I felt was out of line with a comment or two during that meeting. However, calling out Helton’s mother was the worst statement of the night by far. 

I blame ineffective leadership by County Executive Jimmy Haley for the way this three-hour meeting was allowed to spiral out of control with insults, personal attacks, and lengthy rants. The chairman is charged with keeping the meeting focused on the agenda because he or she has the power to stop the meeting and change the subject of discussion. When a chairperson exercises little control over the meeting, situations like this can and do happen. 

Commissioner Gary Prater asked Haley to put a stop to Evans’ comments, which he said were getting out of control. Haley allowed her to continue. 

At one point in the meeting, Haley laughed, called the situation a circus and voiced a desire to see where it went. Well, P.T. Barnum, this show went into my record book as the worst-led meeting of your political career and probably in Warren County government history. 

This meeting should be used as a training exercise, an example used to impress upon elected officials the need for effective communication and effective leadership. Maybe those topics should be the focus in future presentations before the commission. While those skills do not always come naturally, they can be learned.

Standard reporter Lisa Hobbs can be reached at 473-2191.