Because of our wacky Sunday rotation of columnists - which I somehow became a part of despite my best efforts of trying to stick to sports for over a decade - I’m going to get a leg up on all the rest of my colleagues and make my case for being the Standard’s best local columnist. The first ballot is in today’s paper (on 3B) and you can just pencil in my name today and keep it going until May 24.

In reality, I don’t think I need to make much of a sales pitch. Like me or not, I’ve been bringing you the truth (and sometimes it’s the hard truth) about local sports for 14 years now. And during that time, Simmons Says has become one of the staples of reporting in the community. It’ll likely be my one and only legacy in Warren County, though it may be long forgotten even before I am too.

I guess if I really wanted to have a strategy to sway votes my way, I’d just raise the local red flag and that would probably have the rest of my competition waving the white flag shortly after. But I’m not going to do that – don’t vote for me just because I could put a R beside my candidacy on the ballot (for that matter, don’t do that in any upcoming elections either; Try to find out who you’re voting for first and then follow your heart). 

I’d just say vote for me because I want to beat Bethany Porter for the title. That’s my whole sales pitch and I’ll be waiting for her rebuttal.

Since we’re on the subject of Best of the Best though, let me try to drum up a little more support for a few people who I think should get some consideration this year. First and foremost, my mom has been cheated out of Ms. Warren County for - well, I won’t say how many years since she wouldn’t want me to broadcast her age, so let’s just say her whole life. 

She’s tough, she’s resilient and I know I can always count on her when I need anything. She’s got my vote and she should have yours too.

As for community volunteer, I’ll continue to throw my support behind two of my favorite local organizations: Kids of the Community and Special Games. There’s really too many people to just single out one, so I’ll say pick your favorite and vote a lot.

For best waiter or waitress, there are a lot of great ones to choose from. I’d probably throw my support behind Cass (I don’t know her full name) at Waffle House just because I think I made her mad the last time I was there so I figured I’d make it up by voting for her. Good luck, Cass!

And lastly, I hope everybody will throw their support behind Slim for most devoted sports fan. He’s won it many times before, but I think it would be a great gesture if we could get him another win this year. Honestly, we should be naming the category after him before long. 

As for all the other categories, best of luck to everybody and start getting your votes in quick. Everybody loves being Best of the Best.

Standard Sports Editor Jeffery Simmons can be contacted at sports@southernstandard.com