I have very few household skills. Just ask my wife. I’m about as useful around the house as a football bat or a screen door on a submarine.
The commode is messed up? Call the plumber. A board is warped on the floor? Call a carpenter. The car is messed up? Call the tow truck. Just like Andy Griffith once told Aunt Bea in a very special episode, “Aunt Bea, just call the man.”
Now, I do manage to keep the yard mowed provided the mower doesn’t mess up and the weed whacker works (I hate changing the line on the weed whacker but I tend to be able to do that without calling in a serviceman).
With that being said, one would wonder why my youngest son Henry suddenly had a tall request for me.
“I want you to build me a garage,” Henry declared Monday evening after we got home from Lake Winnie.
“Why do want a garage?” I asked. It isn’t every day your 10-year-old asks for his own garage. I mean, maybe a bicycle or a new video game, I can see. But a garage? That seems a bit, different.
“So I can fix the cars,” Henry responded. Well of course. Why else would a kid want a garage but to fix the cars?
Then it hit me. He got the idea from the classic car ride at Lake Winnie earlier that day. For those who haven’t been there (and it seemed like I saw all of McMinnville there Monday) there’s a ride where you can drive some old cars along a track. At the boarding area there’s a little garage called “Henry’s Garage” where they were servicing one of the cars from the ride.
I scratched my head, wondering why he would think that I, a person who admittedly has no useful household skills, would be able to build a garage.
“Where would I build this garage?” I asked.
Henry pointed to the back yard. “Out there.”
It’s great when your kid thinks dad can do anything. However, sometimes it is best to be grounded in reality. Daddy can barely build a fire without burning off his eyebrows (something I did while grilling this weekend but that’s another story).
“I don’t think I can build a whole garage,” I admitted, thinking I would burst his bubble.
“Sure you can,” Henry said confidently. “Thursday.”
What? Now not only have I been directed to undertake a major building project but I’ve also been given a deadline. Sounds like we have a future member of upper management in our family given his unrealistic just-get-it-done attitude.
My answer to his difficult demand was what it usually is when he requests the improbable. “I’ll see what I can do.”
Hopefully Henry will forget about the garage and come up with another grandiose plan that doesn’t involve major construction. Why doesn’t any of his plans ever have to do with just sitting on the couch and watching football?
I’m really good at that.
Standard reporter Duane Sherrill can be reached at 473-2191.